{day 29}

Something you hope to change about yourself & why.
Well this is a little strange but here it goes.
I hope I can learn to love Christmas again.
Christmas used to be my FAVORITE time of year.  My tree was up on Thanksgiving day.  My presents were bought before November ended.  My cards were mailed by December first.  I spent hours upon hours decorating my house.  Every room had something special in it.  I took days to wrap my presents and sang along to all my favorite Christmas songs while I did so.  But this year... every time I attempt to do anything remotely related to Christmas it reminds me of last year.  When I thought everything was happy and perfect.  Except it wasn't.  I just didn't know it.  And now Christmas makes me think of all the heartbreak and betrayal that I went though.  I know it's not Christmas's fault but it still reminds me all the same.  I hope that maybe next year, or in years to come, I can learn to love Christmas again.