Funny things... 

Aaron said to me today... You smell pretty. Did you shower today? I started laughing and still haven't stopped. That man knows how to make me giggle. Even when he's not meaning to.

Everly wore a dress today and tried to find her belly button. It was hilarious. 

When Aaron doesn't have a shirt on Everly always points to his nipples curiously and he responds with "I know baby, I don't know why men have them either."

And this lady. She's my everything.

That line ^^ is one I heard repeatedly when I was young. From my dad. Every time he told me a story it started with "When I was a little girl..." which immediately set me into "Daddy, you were never a little girl!" We'd argue back and forth while my dad laughed hysterically at my insistence that he could never have been a little girl. But insist he did. Over and over he told me that he was a little girl but he grew up into a boy. I was so confused. At 4 or 5 years old I was *pretty sure* that could never happen. But 100%? Nope. The more he said it the more I fought it, and the more I believed that maybe, just maybe, I was going to grow up into a boy. So thanks for that dad. I love you.

ps Isn't he adorable? I love my daddy.

xo  Sue

You read that right, today we're talking about embarrassing moments. I don't embarrass easily. I'm pretty comfortable with myself. And even when I look back at this particular situation I don't think I was so much embarrassed as just thinking "man, this is awkward" the entire time. I suppose that's the same thing though.

So, I'm living in Washington (state). I was an event planner at a beautiful lodge in the Olympic National Park. Most people who worked there lived in these log cabins on the property. We had 2 rooms with a shared bathroom between them. It was like college but better because I had no studying to do. One day all my roomies (and pretty much everyone else) were at work or out playing. I'd just come back from a run and wanted a shower. Since no one was around I stripped down and walked to the bathroom (it was literally 5 steps from my door), leaving the windows and door to my room open because there was a great breeze that day. After my shower I dried off and wrapped my towel around me before walking back to my room. Where the door was now closed. And locked (because it was an automatic lock).

And suddenly it dawns on me that I'm naked with nothing but a towel, locked out of my room, and alone. Oops! So I'm faced with a decision. Do I try and climb through my window in a towel (you know, the one I can't even reach because it's too high off the ground)? Do I walk to the community cabin and call for the maintenance crew to come unlock my door? Or do I wander the cabins and hope someone else is home who can climb through my window for me? Well I picked that last option. It seemed the least horrifying of the three.

And you can probably guess the rest. A (very tall) boy climbed through my window, unlocked my door, and didn't hide his laughter at me being locked out in a towel. Don't worry, I made sure to tweet after it happened.

xo Sue

"A woman can grow a baby inside their body. And then somehow a woman can deliver the baby through their body. And then by some miracle a woman can feed a baby with their body. When you think of the male contribution to life... it's kind of embarrassing." -Jim Gaffigan
xo Sue

I shared something from The Oatmeal a few days ago but I feel once again that I've found something to share. It's just too funny to pass me by. When I read this I realize I have at least one of each type of "facebook friend" and it makes me giggle. So give it a read and figure out what type of friends you have. For your enjoyment, How to Suck at Facebook.

Abby, I hope you enjoy this. Seriously. If someone can laugh along and understand exactly how hysterical this is it's you my friend! But not to worry, everyone should read this! With a sense of humor please. Although... if Twilight is your favorite book in the whole wide universe maybe you should skip it. If you are like me and a bit perplexed on the subject then continue on to find out 

How Twilight Works

Please enjoy.

My dear Calvin. I love you. You always have the best insights when it comes to life. I've learned so much from you over the years and anytime I need a laugh I can always count on you. Today I want to share a few of your thoughts (my favorites!) with my friends, family and fellow bloggers. Enjoy!


I imagine girls and bugs have a dim perception that nature played a cruel trick on them, but they lack the intelligence to really comprehend the magnitude of it. 

Weekends don't count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless.  

Life's disappointments are harder to take when you don't know any swear words.

That's the difference between me and the rest of the world. Happiness isn't good enough. I demand euphoria!  

Girls are like slugs. They probably serve some purpose but it's hard to imagine what.  

Let me set the stage for you.

Sue, Shelly, Morgan, Lindsay, Cori & Jessi are all in the car driving home from Harry Potter at 4:30 in the morning.

We're giddy from the movie.

We're happy to be together.

We're silly little girls.

We start talking about the sexiest men alive.

We're all throwing out names.

Johnny Depp.

Channing Tatum.

Chace Crawford.

Then out of Cori's mouth:

Justin Beiber.

I don't remember the last time I laughed that hard.

I love this girl.

Yesterday I played a little game with my siblings and some of my close friends.  I sent them this in a text:


"If a canoe crash landed in your backyard and all the wheels came off how many snow cones would it take to build a doghouse?"


These were the answers I got back:


"What??"
"1,234"
"Twelve"
"Uh, that's a really difficult question"
"I have no idea"
"Yes to both"'
"Haha I have no clue :)"
"The color 12"
 "Red ;)"

I know, I'm a little crazy.

I am very protective of my friends and their feelings. Especially when it comes to boys. So yesterday I created this application for boys to fill out if they're interested in any of my friends. I've already emailed one out... Enjoy!

APPLICATION FOR PERMISSION TO DATE MY BEST FRIEND Please note: If filling out and returning of application takes longer than a week you will be withdrawn from consideration.

NAME_____________________________________

DATE OF BIRTH_____________

HEIGHT___________ WEIGHT____________ IQ__________

SOCIAL SECURITY #_________________

DRIVERS LICENSE #________________

BOY SCOUT RANK AND BADGES_________________________________

HOME ADDRESS________________________________________

CITY/STATE____________________________ ZIP__________

Do you have parents? ___Yes ___No

Number of years they have been married ____________________

ACCESSORIES SECTION:

A. Do you own or have access to a van?

B. A truck with oversized tires?

C. A waterbed?

D. A pickup with a mattress in the back?

(IF YOU ANSWERED "YES" TO ANY OF THE ABOVE, DISCONTINUE

APPLICATION AND SEVER ALL CONTACT IMMEDIATELY)

ESSAY SECTION:In 50 words or less, what does "LATE" mean to you?

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

In 50 words or less, what does "DON'T TOUCH MY FRIEND" mean to you?

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

In 50 words or less, what does "ABSTINENCE" mean to you?

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

REFERENCES SECTION:

Church you attend _____________________________

How often you attend __________________________

When would be the best time to interview your (include name and phone number):

father? _______________________________________

mother? _______________________________________

best friend? __________________________________

worst enemy? __________________________________

SHORT-ANSWER SECTION:

Answer by filling in the blank. Please answer freely, all answers are confidential. If you lie I will know.

A: If I were shot, the last place I would want shot would be:

_______________________________________________

B: If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my:

_______________________________________________

C: A woman's place is in the:

_______________________________________________

D: The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is:

_______________________________________________

E. What do you want to do IF you grow up? _______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

F. When I meet a girl, the thing I always notice about her first is:

_______________________________________________

F. What is the current going rate of a hotel room?

__________________

I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT, NATIVE AMERICAN ANT TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE WATER TORTURE, RED HOT POKERS, AND HILLARY CLINTON KISS TORTURE.

_______________________________________________

Applicant's Signature

Thank you for your interest, and it had better be genuine and non-sexual. Please allow four to six years for processing. You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. Please do not try to call or write. If your application is rejected, you will be notified by two gentleman wearing white ties carrying violin cases.